Laughing Medusas

When I write, it's everything that we don't know we can be that is written out of me, without exclusions, without stipulation, and everything we will be calls us to the unflagging, intoxicating, unappeasable search for love. In one another we will never be lacking. ~Helene Cixous "The Laugh of the Medusa"

Thursday, April 01, 2004

I Dreamed I had Awoken in Your Arms 

I dreamed I had awoken in your arms. You were still sleeping - so peaceful, so content. I just wanted to touch your face. To close my eyes and memorize how you feel beneath my fingertips. I was going to let you sleep so my hands only wandered down your neck and shoulders, then the length of your arm. I took your hand in mine and brought it to my lips.

I kissed your fingers, on which my scent still lingered from the night before. Memories, as random disconnected images, flooded my mind. I heard your voice whispering poetry softly in my ear and felt my nipples harden from the gentle breeze of your words. I tasted you in the back of my throat and me upon your lips. I felt your hands cupping my breasts and your fingers tracing my tattoo.

As I opened my eyes, desire growing anew, I saw you watching me, holding your hand to my lips and breathing the scent of our sex. I teased your middle finger with my tongue before taking it in my mouth, still locked in your gaze. You took your hand from me to stroke the inside of my thighs, while parting them slightly. Just enough to allow you to enter me and make me gasp.

"Shhh..." was all you said as you began to slowly slide in and out of me. I began to thrust back, wanting to go faster. But you placed your hands on my hips and held me to your slow, steady pace. Your fingers danced lightly across me, maintaining contact just long enough to leave my skin craving your touch. And your hips continued to rise and fall in slow, deliberate movements. We both knew if you would thrust just a bit harder or just a bit faster, it would push me over the edge. I opened my mouth to plead and you placed your finger on my lips.

"Shhh..." your eyes seeing the plea in mine before I could speak.

My body had begun to tremble in anticipation. You kept the same maddening pace, and leaned to kiss me. As your tongue parted my lips, pleasure washed over me. You kept your mouth on mine, swallowing my ecstatic cries. Still you kept the same pace. Until, quivering beneath you, I took your face in my hands, gazed into your eyes and softly moaned your name. Your face contorted and you pulled me close as you finally let your desire overcome you.

I opened my eyes and it was only when I turned to kiss you, that I realized you weren't here and I had only dreamed I had awoken in your arms.

posted  @ 1:12 AM

Monday, March 29, 2004


In my dreams, you take so many forms. You are the fear that threatens to swallow me, but never follows through before I wake up. You are the tear that never quite forms and therefore never falls. You are the orgasm I never quite achieve. You are, just out of my reach.

I hope you stay there. What would I do with you, if just once, you came within my grasp? Actually, if it was just once, I know all too well what I would do with you.

I would run my fingers slowly through your hair. I would caress your face gently, staring into the abyss behind your eyes. Then I would kiss your full lips that draw me towards them. I would snuggle my head into the crook of your neck and breathe hotly against your neck. Then I would breathe faster and heave my breasts into you with each breath, and I would breathe faster and faster, faster and faster… and then bite your neck. You would want to laugh at the cheesiness of it, but I know just where to bite you to make you tingle all the way to your toes.

I would tease you, a lot. I would grind, smirk, press against, brush against, every trick I have ever learned, I would play. I would make you ache with desire for me, the way I have ached for you for months now. I would suck you, until you almost came, and then I would blow cool air just below the head and down your shaft. I would fuck you, thrusting hard and fast, hard and fast, hard and fast … and then tighten myself and slow down. Then thrust hard and sudden, and again, faster, thrusting hard and fast again… then again, I would tighten my pussy and slow down. I would give you the fuck of your lifetime. And you would learn, like I have learned, that fucking can be artistic and it’s an art worth learning. And after all this, I would snuggle into you. Curling up in your arms, sleeping with my arms around you after we have worn each other to exhaustion.

What I don’t know is, after all that, what I would do with you then. I would like to think that I would want to keep you and you would want to keep me. But I have a habit of losing respect for people once I fuck them. At least I used to, but that may have had something to do with not respecting myself. Maybe that has changed, I am not sure. I am not sure I want you to be my guinea pig. Perhaps then, you should just remain my fantasy.

If you never give in, I can never hurt you.

posted  @ 9:31 PM


holding sunsets more dearly
than the most iridescent sunrise
as I am a creature of night
where all things
presumably transcendental

yet it plays on my eyes
like the wind upon your hair
in Prospect Park
telling me all things
presumably eternal
lie instead
in its glimmering canopy

that I could merely trust
its laughing rays
and cast off
the moon as my lover
I might find you
unclad against
the noonday sun

- Adetoun
posted  @ 7:06 AM

Sunday, March 28, 2004


When the touch is more than lust
And the words are more than flattery

When your voice fills my mind
While your mouth is on my breast

When your eyes still penetrate my soul
Though my face is buried between your thighs

When your memory evokes for me
Your taste upon my tongue

When I realize I've gone too far
To hide my heart from you

When I understand too late
That I'm in love again

posted  @ 11:12 PM


Spilling out
sweet utterance
crossing satellites
that sacred spot
where I find you
between my thighs
your head looking up
as if for approval
my hand on your
wavy lifelines
giving comfort
that you please
that from which might come life
in another lifetime

- Adetoun
posted  @ 3:57 PM


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Lane Bryant